No Inspiration

A misanthropic rant

2011-11-04T18:50:00.000+02:00

We said, she said, he said , I.. What have we been saying all this time to each other and why? Is life being distilled trough our words like paint smudges on a canopy in life’s endless dream? Are we born only to be a Cosmic joke and eventually *pfft* out of existence like a Mayfly without a seeming embrace of the World and life, being in too much of a hurry to live and love and hate and hope and shatter ourselves against the rocks of our prides and joys, debilitated by our senses and intoxicated by our dreams? Is this only a mere dream of a forgotten breed of creatures that might have conquered their Universe if only had they not been so uninspiringly boring? Is LIFE just a pipe-dream in a crack den? Is this hard, horrible amalgamated circus of freaks and geeks all that we are? How do we find beauty when beauty is a fabrication just as grotesque if not more so than ugliness in it’s rawest form? Where is the lie that binds all this Carnival of endless despair from which one cannot escape and only those who ignore all but a small portion of it can find happiness in? What is it? What does it look like? What does it feel and taste and smell like? What does it transform you into and what would you transform it into if for one infinitesimal proportion of the 4^th lie we adhere to – time – you could encompass it all? Would you be broken of the binds and chains that cause you to be you relative to this and that and nothing more? Would you become One, become the Buddhist ideal? Would you become part of the Christian God? Would you simply shatter into an infinity of pieces of yourself and truly become part of It? Or would you merely be crushed into a nothingth of a nothing be the sheer vastness or perhaps the indeed joyless and cramped lack of absolute substance from which it is formed?

The questions are grim and stupid. Boredom sets in me and takes hold of my mind and my spirit. That the mind is infinite in possibilities and endless in curiosity is a false assumption. It is not in us to be curious of all things, for we are not creatures of pure reason or thought; we are creatures also of physical manifestation, prone to find our comfort, especially when it comes to that which lies beyond our grasp. But foremost we are creatures of feeling; meat machines drudging on, never being satisfied or complete, as having the biological and intellectual needs settled we immerse ourselves in the bottomless pit that are emotions and let ourselves be dulled and bogged down in ourselves.

The problem in my eyes – and in my eyes it is first and last – is not that we can literally waste our lives in emotions and feelings, but that we are biologically incapable of isolation. To be alone is to be dead, is to fail in one of the strongest biological needs still written in every cell of our bodies: to reproduce; to be alone means to die before one has ever even conceived one’s own death because that – and this is something that every creature that reproduces sexually understands intrinsically – is the end of it’s genetic variation. So, to be alone is to be dead and to be alive is to be dulled by one’s own perceptions and feelings but also to be immersed in society’s welcoming claws. Pity...

As a note, this is written in my own dulled perception for the world I have come to despise so much in my short lie of an existence and will be probably be shown to and read by the very people I have fondly grown to hate but with whom I can’t do without.

Joi seara

2011-09-29T21:11:00.000+03:00

E Joi seara...

Stau la calculator in chiloti si ma holbez pe Facebook la imaginara viata a pretinsilor (sau imaginarilor?) mei prieteni. Undeva in fundal se aude (pa ripit ba) de jumatate de ora acelasi rahat de melodie in timp ce in jurul meu se aud zgomotele aproape murdare ale vietii de zi cu zi..
[..] In timp ce eu inebunesc cantand "I can ride my bike with no handlebars" undeva afara se aude un tipat scurt, sec, care aproape isi acopera ecoul, ca un latrat sau macanit de cocalar, o chemare in noapte, in spate se aud zgomote din bucatarie, cineva din familia mea isi traieste nefericirea si micul compus descompus de complexe drame penibile si copilaresti (sa-l fut pe ala care comenteaza ca nu are sens ce am scris) in timp ce masinile trec prin noapte in cautarea de noi victime.

Si eu.. pot sa merg pe bicicleta fara maini.

Fuck all of you all

P.S.: As fi incheiat cu "sa va iau pe toti in pula" dar m-am gandit ca unii ar fi luat asta ca pe o invitatie.

How I quit smoking. A journal written while I was doing it - Day #1

2011-06-23T15:05:00.001+03:00

Day #1
I woke up this morning with the taste of absolute shit in my mouth. I know that after you quit some things start to change or work well, but I had no recollection of this ungodly taste (and probably smell) that resided in my mouth, probably coming from the viscous, chunky liquid that was my saliva.
After doing the usual morning toilet routine (adding 3 extra brushings and drinking about half a bottle of mouthwash), my morning coffee ritual (vacantly drink it while I stare half-conscious into my computer’s screen) and my morning “holy shit I’m late for work AGAIN” ritual I (hastily) left for work. What I didn’t know was that all this glorious ritualistic slacking off was really just a cocoon of safety. I seldom smoke indoors (bars don’t count) and even less at home so as long as I was still in my home I didn’t feel the urge.
Also there was another problem. There’s a little ritual I ~~have~~ had. Every morning I would smoke about half a cigarette to a cigarette waiting for the bus and another getting off the bus at work (it’s a 15 minute ride). This morning however, – after spending 10 minutes downwind from what appeared to be a local chapter of the National Smoker’s Association) –, I had the pleasure, nay HONOUR of being (as usual) bruised and battered by decrepit old fucks in the bus, smelling their dead bodies and everyone else’s armpit juice with no destructive chemicals altering my senses at all, nothing to dull the edge there, not even a little bit.
Getting off the bus the only thing in my head was “I need a bloody cigarette; smoked, sucked, snorted, injected or rectally absorbed”. Hitting the wall of reality and sun (fucking summer), a small tear wet my cheek and quickly evaporated and with a sigh and wishing the death of every creature in the galaxy I headed to work.
It’s not nice to complain about co-workers so I won’t.

...

At about 3PM I borrowed a cigarette and felt happiest I’ve been since I was a child and my grandmother bought me an ice cream on a hot day waiting for a train…

...

SHIT! FUCKING SHIT!

Nascuti la inceputul anilor 80 (preluat)

2011-04-10T16:26:00.000+03:00

Nascuti la inceputul anilor 80, vedem acum cum casa parintilor nostri este de 50 de ori mai scumpa decat atunci cand au cumparat-o si realizam ca noi o sa platim pentru casele noastre in jur de 50 de ani.

Nu avem amintiri despre primii pasi pe luna, nici despre razboaie sangeroase, dar avem cultura generala pentru ca asta insemna ceva odata.Suntem printre ultimele generatii care au jucat "Ascunselea","Castel","Ratele si vanatorii", "Tara,tara! Vrem ostasi", "Prinselea", "Sticluta cu otrava"," Hotii si vardistii", printre ultimii care au strigat "Un ,doi,trei la perete stai", printre ultimii care au folosit telefoanele cu fise, dar primii care am facut petreceri video(inchiriam un video si stateam sa ne uitam la filme 2 zile inchisi in casa), primii care au vazut desene animate color, primii care am renuntat la casete audio si le-am inlocuit cu CD-uri.

Noi am purtat jeansi elastici, geci de blugi de le turci, iar cine avea firme gen Lee sau Puma era deja lider de gasca. Noi am dat examene de capacitate si nu am dat teste grile la admitere. La gradinita am invatat poezii in romana, nu in engleza....si am cantat "Multi ani traiasca!" , nu "Happy birthday!" la aniversari. Am sorbit din ochi Beverly Hills, Melrose Place, Twin Peaks, Dallas...si cine zice ca nu s-a uitat ori minte ori nu avea inca televizor. Reclamele de pe posturile straine ne inebuneau, si abia asteptam sa vina si la noi inghetata Magnum sau pustile alea absolut superbe cu apa.Intre timp ne consolam cu Tango de vanilie si ciocolata si clasicele bidoane umplute cu apa de la robinet care turnate in cap ne provocau pneumonii. Si uite un motiv bun sa nu mergem la scoala.

Noi ascultam Metallica si Ace of base,si Michael Jackson si Backstreet Boys , si Take That ,sau Holograf, Iris,iar mai tarziu Bere Gratis sau Spitalul de Urgenta si inca nu auzisem de manele singurele melodii de joc fiind horele la chefuri la care nimeni nu stia pasii dar toti dansam.

Dar spre deosebire de copii din ziua de azi , am auzit de Abba si de Queen cat si de noile nume gen 50 Cent si Eminem. Am citit "Licurici", "Ciresarii" si am baut Cico si Zmeurata si ni s-a parut ceva extraordinar cand au aparut primele sucuri "Tutti Frutti" sau acele sucuri la punga, fara sa ne fie teama ca "au prea multe E-uri", iar la scoala beam toata clasa dintr-o sticla de suc fara teama de virusi.

Noi am baut prima Coca-Cola la sticla si am descoperit internetul. Noi nu ne dadeam beep-uri, ne fluieram sa iesim afara, noi nu aveam dolby surround system, taceam toti ca sa auzim actiunea filmului, nu aveam Nintendo, Playstation, ci jocuri Tetris de care ne plictiseam la o luna dupa ce le cumparam si le uitam pe dulap pline de praf. Abia asteptam la chefuri sa jucam "Flori,fete sau baieti" sau "Adevar sau provocare" sau orice ne dadea un pretext sa "pupam pe gura" pe cine "iubeam".

Noi suntem cei care inca au mai "cerut prietenia", care inca roseam la cuvantul "sex", care dadeam cu banul care sa intre la farmacie sa cumpere prezervative, pe care apoi sa le umplem cu apa si sa le aruncam in capul colegilor sau prietenilor, cei care am completat mii de oracole sperand ca persoana iubita va citit acolo unde scrie "De cine iti place?" ca ne place de el/ea.

Este uimitor ca inca mai suntem in viata, pentru ca noi am mers cu bicicleta fara casca, genunchiere si cotiere, nu am avut scaune speciale in masini, nu am aruncat la gunoi bomboanele care ne cadeau din greseala pe jos, nu am avut pastile cu capac special sa nu fie desfacute de copii, nu ne-am spalat pe maini dupa ce ne-am jucat cu toti cainii si toate pisicile din cartier, nu am tinut cont de cate lipide si glucide mancam, parintii nostri nu au facut casa "child proof", ne-au trimis sa cumparam bere, vin si tigari de la alimentara.

Noi am fost martorii a trei schimbari de moneda, noi am ras la bancuri cu Bula, noi am fost primii care au vazut-o pe Andreea Esca la Pro TV, noi suntem cei care mai tinem minte emisiunea "Feriti-va de magarus" sau "Abracadabra". Suntem o generatie de invingatori, de visatori si de "first-timers"...

Daca citesti si ai cazut macar pe ganduri esti de-al nostru.

Giant rabbits will solve hunger

2010-03-10T08:07:00.000+02:00

Via: Online Schools

2010-02-27T23:54:00.001+02:00

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	Very High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Very High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	High
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Very High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Extreme
Level 7 (Violent)	Extreme
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Extreme
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Extreme

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test